credits

this will be the end of this chapter in life. i'll be moving on...................

thanks to my dear friends who had been with through the good times and bad.

life will never be the same again.


thank you, Izzey for being the light of my life till now.

birthday bash surprise

boyfie and i rented a car for the weekend. we went for a spin and spent time together in the car. on fri, we took my family out for dinner and he took his mom out on sat morning. so we went out on sat afternoon for movie and went for a spin around town.

Sunday was a delightful surprise though. coz i tot he didnt plan anything for me! he said let's just go with the flow when we go out. coz i actually said to him, i'm expecting something for my bday! since we didnt really celebrate my bday together so he said he wanna make it up to me. but there wasnt anything plan on fri or sat. so i was disappointed and pissed.

then Sat, he told me to meet at 9 am the next day, sun. so i waited and waited till 10 am. he arrived at my doorstep singingpaparazzi with the rest of the guys shouting 'SURPRISE! HAPPY BDAY SHASHA!!' i was like, wats the commotion outside?! it was super sweet to see all of them outside my doorstep in the morning.

then we proceed to sentosa for picnic and cake cutting! i have to thank NANA for making the deliciously sweet filling cake and preparing all the food! oh oh, and NANA'S IBU!! THANK U CIK!!

the guys, i know u guys went out on sat nite but thank u for making sure Is woke up early. i mean going thru the extend of sleeping over at faizal's place after he came from reservist and then for the an early morning. awww.........

picnic was so filling coz i ate too much. then LUGE was crazy. the boys were going crazy to win the race. oh well, it was a race amongst them. not us, girls. we were cruising! hahahahha!

i know we all had fun and it was so tiring for everybody that me and boyfie got sick.

so here's a THANK U note...........................................

words is not enough to say how much i really appreciate you
all the complaints, rantings
really regretting it now
realising that it's me whose wrong
whatever u've done for me
i'm grateful u're in life
thank u
i love u, IS

23 years young

yeahness!! (in the words of brenda) i've turned 23rd with the blessings of Allah that I'm still alive and kicking to witness the day of my birth. hahaha!! SYUKUR ALHAMDULILLAH! (its a 1st, something religious on this blog)

this year, birthday was like any other normal day lar. wasnt expecting anything but hey, it was nice to have everyone gather for dinner on my bday. hardly see the rest of my family eating together. so its like a reunion lar.

anyways, the fact remains that even when i say i feel like an old lady because of my stupid aching body. i still feel like i'm an 18 yr girl. hahahahahhaha!!! dont feel like an adult at all!! nah, i still get nagged by my parents. my younger sis and bro will check on me time to time and will lecture me if they have to. but!! its not that i dont know how to take care of myself, its just i dun care much so they think i tu-lan! and my bro will msg me asking me wer am i, as if he's the older one! CEH!!

being 23!!! gosh!! 9 more months to graduation! 1 year more to working life! 2-4 years to get married! 5-6 years to have babies! 7 YEARS to the age, 30!! ARGH!!

well, more memories to make in the future...

HAPPY 23RD BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!

bday?

its gonna be another day. this is for expecting something on that so called special day. so much for asking a surprise. and indeed a surprise that i got. nothing. every year it lead to nothing special. well, i guess i'm not that special enough to have people appreciate me. oh well, i guess i dun show any bit of graciousness to anybody that the people i love surrounding me doesnt really care if its my special day. its just gonna another weekday. boring weekday that passes by and people wanna get over and done with. let the weekend come. forget about the wednesday that mean something to me. i guess if i gone missing, people wont even notice. he wont notice.

-------let me rot and get stacked within the huge piles of paper.----

weddings

so its THE season to get married. june holidays are here again and this weekend alone, i went to 4 different weddings. all of whom are completely so called strangers to me. coz i dun even know them except they have this relative thingy with my family. anyhow, all concepts are very different but one stands out the most coz the food was served old-styled. reminiscing the olden days when my parents and older cousin got married and everyone in the extended family helped out to serve the dishes and clear the plates. i remembered playing with water when i was supposed to wash plates and cups... hahahhahaha... the rest of the wedding, normal lar.. buffet style, then food cold. then one thing i hate about going to weddings is these people keep asking when's my turn.. for goodness sake, i'm not even done with school yet. oh well, some even say i looked like mak org... oh well, i look old for my age. but who cares. i like it like this.

so then me and my cousins and my aunt started to talk about weddings. i told them i wanna do it at sce sch hall coz there's air con... hahahhaha... but dun think can lar... just do at CC lar... but the one i went on sat, the CC hall very small.. and the food was cold.... hmmm.... at void deck, too hot.. so hot then i was perspiring that my make up almost wore off.

so much talk about wedding, i dun even know whether i'm meant for him... =(

in a day's life

so how long has it been?? its been so long since i blog. anyway, i'm busy with my internship la... then back to school for another 6 months... then its GRADUATION, babe!!

but my love life has been great though... baby has been so romantic as ever... makes me feel like i wanna get married with him now... i even ask him to get engage.. ok... i think i should stop now. haiz...

ok there's nothing much to blog about anyway.

oh, i've catched 4 movies in a week. gila kan.... angels & demons, terminator salvation, night at the musuem 2 and moster vs aliens.

orh then, half of the year has gone so it means my birthday's coming. and i'm working. damn!

thanks my lil sis, for treating me swensens for an early bday celebration. eheh.... =)

the period of the month

i hate this feeling of the month. i hate weekends also. i just cant get things i want. i never ask for the moon or stars. i just wanna spend the weekend with my loved ones but end up i'm at home without them. just like any other day.

i want to understand him but i cant seem to. i want attention but the attention given is just a while. when i want to let go, he's ready to give anything to me. but now, same je.... wait? yar, i'm waiting... still waiting.... and waiting....

i always remember what he says, promises to me. and i'm still waiting. or do i expect too much from him? but wat am i expecting from him? wat i want from him?

i dont want to expect anything from him because i know it would lead to a disappointment if i expect something from him.

argh!!! i'm so damn f*cked up. shitty shitty shitty!!!

its over.

i'm in a confused state of mind. yes or no??

i dun wan to hurt him but looks like i did. all i want is for him to be happy and the best for us. which is to lead our own way of life now. he can now lead the life the way he always want. the space he wants, with no restrictions. i can live without worrying that my boyfriend has the hots for other girls.

i'm really sorry i've let u guys (u know who u r) down and that i've wronged him. i can't live with this guilt with him. knowing that it hurt him, it has also deteriorate our r'ship.

i've loved iskhandar zulkarnain more than i love myself. he's the 1st man to teach me the way of life and how cruel the world out there.

but i still believe he can live without me. i will deal with all the pain, regret, torment, sadness, lonliness, happines alone. guys, be there for him.

me? i just immerse myself with work. ot and more ot. i dont mind anyway.

so for now, no more love story.


***UPDATE***
we're back together with the help of friends.

fed-up

i'm so damn fed-up. tired. bored. stupid shit!

i hate this feeling!

no, its not boyfie. he's fine. keeping me happy here and there. but its my bloody surroundings! argh!!!!!

busy and its a silent world now.

Its been quite a while since i posted something. see, my laptop has been with boyfie all this time. and now only, i got it back. even its with me, by the time i got back, i'm super uber tired to actually do anything at all. all i do at home is shower, eat, sleep. i'm just gonna say that i've started attachment alrdy. period. nothing at all. nothing about it at all.

BUT one thing i can post is about my life. to be specific my love life. yes, again. wat to do? this is the only place for me to get it out. i dunno lar this time. he's giving me like a cold shoulder. when i talk to him ,he gives me a sulky face and sounds as if he doesnt wanna talk to me. i understand he's feeling bitter abt the psp but its like he's taking it on me.

wat happened to the psp, u may ask? i've been holding on to his psp, and remember i spilled water on it, and then i got it repaired. and I DID! then it gave problems again, it totally shut down on us. it didn't want to switch ON. can't be switch on at all. DAMN ar!! one problem after another. then he sent for it to be fix but the technician cant find any way to repair to its original state. coz they dont have the modified motherboard or something. wat they have is the motherboard which only can play UMD games, not downloadable games in a memory stick. so he got sian and decided to buy a NEW psp. headed down to sim lim and the salesperson says its modified and can play downloadable games, say all the specifications that my boyfie was looking for. but in the end, he got cheated. the psp he bought also cant play the downloadable games. so he went to get a refund but not a full amount.

DAMN cheater! the guy who sold the psp to my boyfie won't get a good life, i tell u! cheat people money! KNN CCB!!!!! make sure the shop suffer losses and has to wind up!!! if u want to know which specific shop, u come and ask me. call me or email me. KNN!

ADVICE TO PEOPLE OUT THERE!
PLEASE BE AWARE WHEN PURCHASING STUFFS AT SIM LIM! ITS CHEAP BUT THERE ARE RISKS TO BE TAKEN! PLEASE CHECK BEFORE PURCHASING AND IF CAN, BRING AN EXPERT OF WHATEVER U'RE BUYING!

becoz of that stupid asshole, jerk, dork, s.o.b, now my boyfie is not even talking to me in a decent way. i'm kinda disappointed with him on how the way he handle this but i understand his troubled situation. he's always the stronger one in terms of emotional. oh well, so i just have to wait and let the bad air flow away..

fell head over heels.

suddenly i have this mad rush for cute, charming, gorgeous, KAWAII boys, men!!! boyfie one side.. a while jek... i watched a couple of dvd movies today. so i remembered how i love:

1. Orlando Bloom

2. James Franco

3. Johnny Depp


4. and Takeshi Kaneshiro

i just find the half jap-taiwan guy is super duper cute. he got this gorgeous, captivating, seductive eyes.... arh.....(melting away)


ok, back to reality........................

feel like a princess

yesterday, i went out with boyfie for a date after long time. i enjoyed myself so much the whole day yesterday. ee... best arh!

we did quite a lot of things together.. hahaha.. just spending quality time together. but i was kinda pissed off with him before we met coz i had to wait for him again. this time i waited for him for 15 mins. i almost wanted to go home coz i didn't want to wait. i was all dressed up. all dolled up with make up wearing a dress and heels. but pity, i didnt take any photos. everytime i ask to take photos he said later, then later i forgotten all about it.

so when we met up, i was all quiet but he suggested to watch movie at the cathay. 1st we head down to pastamania to have lunch. then bought tickets and PS GV instead of the cathay coz it was yraining and i didnt bring any brollie. so we stayed indoors. We window shopped a bit, checked some toys, figurines, those from movies, comics and cartoons. We saw the human size Terminator robot!! and boyfie really loves it and wanted to have it. can u imagine having the huge thing in the house??!! and it costs $10,000 plus. Giler!!

so by the time, we had bought the tickets and went downstairs for a snack. it stopped raining and boyfie brought me to the cathay to eat ben & jerry's ice cream. best best! OISHI!! He did brought me to ben & jerry's at vivo on monday. and yesterday, again! best lar.

done with the indulgence, we watched PUSH. a movie where these people has special powers. its kinda cool at the same time, boyfie thinks its kinda lame. dunno lar he. but i enjoyed watching it. cool lar.

so after movie, had dinner at long john's silver. we headed home. i know it's not like i had a candlelight dinner date with boyfie but the fact that he made sure i wasn't bored and he treated me like a princess. he ordered food for me, held my hand most of the time. it was like the first date i never had. hopefully there're more to come. love u, baby!

quizzy

I just took the "How much do u love u?" quiz bcoz i'm so freaking bored at home alone and i couldn't be bothered to clean my room or do any of the housework. just have to do it all later.. haha so this is my results... ^__^

According to the results of this quiz, you LOVE you a 71%!!!

PERFECT!!! This is the best score to get! I promise! This means that not only do you actually LOVE who you REALLY and AUTHENTICALLY are, but that you accept the fact that you are NOT perfect to everyone and have flaws which should be kept as a balance, you are a very optimistic and realistic person!! Love ya too already!! Great Job!

How much do you LOVE YOU?
Take More Quizzes

updates

~UPDATES~

1. I've yet to update about my Japanese ladies.
2. I screwed up my last exam paper. i'm dead.
3. I damaged Boyfie's psp and he's damn pissed off at me. It cost me 50 bucks for the repair and a whole lot of trouble and irritating stuff!
4. I had a class gathering cum Charlyn's B'day celebration on Mon, 2 Mar 09.
(look at the pics)
5. Also, I'm starting my internship soon so I'll be missing in action.

till then..............

kaypoh people!

I don't understand that a piece of news can spread super uber fast. It's really irritating when its about your own self. Argh, super irritating. Not only that the main info they know, but also the freaking personal details.

EEE!!! GERAMNYE!!!

Akiho & Aiko

I'm so missing them.
The Japanese girls.
Akiho & Aiko.

I miss saying Oishi, Kawaii!!!!

TGIF

another day of the week and of coz, end of the week some more. Sue and me went to our usual spot, Al-Azhar for friday lunch.. hehehe... then we head down to McD to revise FMGT... then we got bored after awhile and we took pictures, even recorded me doing a stupid video of Blue's All Rise.

here u go.. have fun laughing at me.. i look so stupid and spastic



this is SUE being bored and cam-whoring using my phone


the both of us


then we took pics of our hair to see what is it like from the back

^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
and this is the infamous video that sue has been bugging me to upload. spastic me.

WW III

WORLD WAR III HAS STARTED BETWEEN 2 _ _ _ _ _ _ S.

AND I'M ALWAYS LAUGHING AT THE SIDE. WATCHING THE 'GREAT' SHOW.

**this is the second quabble i know that i'm laughing at**

hahahaha... i know i'm mean... laughing at other people when they fight.... hmm, don't they know that they will kiss and make up again. tsk tsk tsk! then they will realise how silly the argument is BUT on the other hand, i don't think they will coz' both want to win. No one want to give in. tsk tsk tsk! don't want to compromise also. tsk tsk tsk!

but who cares, i'm laughing anyway.

p/s: i'm not saying any names, but if u think i'm saying u then.... who eats the chilli, taste the spiciness, in the words of a malay proverb "siapa makan cili, rasa pedasnya"

today, boyfie gave me a very grumpy look.

his reason bcoz he's hungry!!! argh!!!! so frustrating!

he always like that seh... ishk!!

i miss my lil sister

today, i went to great world city with sue. then met up wit my sis whose working at esprit. it's been a long time since we sisters hang out together. so when i got there, i was just in time for her break. we ate, talk and laugh together. spend good quality time with her. not to mention that the food was on her. so was my 'shopping' at esprit. she bought a couple of stuffs. i realised this is the 2nd time she paid for my 'shopping'. i feel so 'awwed', speechless. i dunno.

i seldom see her these days. she's always working, so busy. hardly see her at home. when i'm around, she isn't. when she's home, i'm not.

then on my journey back home, i realised i really miss her. i really miss hanging out with her. i miss having our girly talk everytime before we go to bed. i miss going shopping with her. i miss the times when i ask her opinions whether my clothes match. i miss her lecturing me as if she's the older sis.

blame it on our schedule. blame it on her work commitment and my school commitment. blame it on the fact that we both have our own boyfren to attend to. blame it on the fact tat we all grow up too fast.

and it's gonna be worse if we both are married.