worst of them all

My argument with Oppa made me realise a few things about my relationship with him. He maybe a demanding boyfriend who wants the girlfriend to listen to him all the time but his main intention was to make me happy now and for the future. I dont agree with him sometimes but his intention is good.

I thought i can pull through this and end it all for once but deep down in my heart yearns for him. I kept telling myself that the next time it happens and i got hurt badly, i'm gonna leave him. I was cool, no tears until Sunday night. I can't sleep for some reason and was awake at 2am. I started to text him and assumed he was asleep. He replied though, we kept texting each other till about 430 in the morning.

I can't hold back my tears when he told me not to leave and torment him like this. I'm not going to reveal too much on our conversation coz i wanna respect him as a person and sort of our privacy.

It all started with a disagreement on his expenses and that birthday party which i was supposed to attend. He sent me a text asking whether i wanna go out with my GFFs and their BFs. So i forgo the party and looked forward to go out with the people i loved spending time with. Ever since Oppa introduced me to his friends and GFs, i grown fond of them. They're really fun to be with. Anyways, back to the topic, since i forgo the party and anxiously waiting for Oppa text to go out, he didn't text me or call until it was 6pm when i sent a text. He was sleeping and decided not to go out instead.

I WAS DAMN FURIOUS, OK!

make me wait for u, then u say don't want to go out! I could have gone out for the party, right? but, he said instead we should go for the party instead since we dont have to use our money to eat and all.. HELLLO!!! if i'm going to the party, i would want to go out earlier and buy something for the birthday person lar!!! the party starts at 7pm, its about 630pm when he decide we should go for the party. tell me, wouldn't you be freaking angry!!!???

So argument started, yada yada yada......

I told him I so pissed at him that I don't want to meet him on Sunday 'cause we have soccer every Sunday at Pasir Ris park. But he insisted that he wants to come. I really told him off that I really don't want to meet him. He's so persisted and stubborn. That's 2 things i dont really like about him. Always wanting to do his way.

On that fateful Sunday itself, imagine we were both at the same place together in front of my family and yet i didn't utter a single word to him. And so, being the insecure girlfriend that i am, i checked his inbox in his hp. (go read my old posts, and u'll know why) Girls again! Different ones some more! I was hurt, disappointed, frustrated and filled with rage!!!!

I FELT LIKE CRYING, IN FRONT OF MY MUM!

I held it back, and argued more with him that night. I asked for a break-up 'cause I had enough! We exchanged texts and i managed not to tear. Even i was surprised, ok! But what changed my mind was, how my love for him is stronger than i thought and how sincere he was when he called. When he told me, he would love me till the day he die, WE cried together. I could hear him cry. Call me, weak and i admit it. He, Iskhandar Zulkarnain, who has change my life, my whole being as a person throughout my time with him. I don't think i can make it without him.